Dating & Relationships

It’s almost that time of the year again…Valentine’s day. It’s silently expected from your girl that you do something special for her, something to show her how much you love her. But what do you do for Valentine’s day this year?

Personally I think that Valentine’s day, Christmas, Easter, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day have become way too commercialized. It is stamped into your mind by social conditioning that you need to spend money on these days to show people that you care about them.

What happened to, ‘The best things in life are free’? Love is totally independent from material cost or possessions. I’m sure that you’d much rather spend the day taking a walk on the beach with the person you love than getting a $5000 watch from them while they’re too busy to see you. (I bet some of you will say you’d rather have the watch but in that case it’s not really love).
Valentines Day Ideas

Valentines Day Ideas

This brings me back to my main point. It’s Valentine’s day, and what do you do for your girl?
I was thinking of some things that I could do, like:

Booking a night in a luxurious hotel room for $200+ or booking a night in a spa hotel for $600+. Heck, you could even take her out for a fancy dinner which will likely cost you around $80 or more.

I think that you should do something special for your girl on Valentine’s Day, but it doesn’t necessarily have to cost you a lot of money. Often the most memorable and meaningful gifts are ones that are handmade or gifts that offer experiences (like a picnic on the beach at sunset).




57 Valentines Day Ideas



I’ve written all of these ideas from the perspective of guy to girl, but ladies, of course you can use any one of these ideas to make your man’s Valentine’s Day special too.



Pack a Picnic

Whether you just go for a lunch in a park or do a romantic evening picnic on the beach at sunset, the idea is that you get to spend quality time together, chat, laugh an enjoy great food.




Cook Her Dinner

This is really special if you hardly ever cook. Get a tasty recipe with all her favorite food and cook it at home for her. Add candles and a couple of roses and you’re set! (If you can’t cook you might want to practice the recipe before the actual day).





Play Her A Song (Yourself)

Imagine being able to play your girl’s favorite song on piano or guitar. She’ll be crazy about you!
Even if you have no musical experience, if you have the instrument it’s not that hard to learn a single song. Just search on Youtube for a tutorial and you will find dozens of videos that teach you note for note how to play the song you are looking for. Depending on the song you can learn to play it with a couple of hours of practice.





DVD Night With Sweets

It’s kind of cliche really, but still fun. Hire a couple of DVD’s (romantic comedy/drama get bonus points), pack your fridge full of cake, chocolate and her favorite sweets and enjoy an evening of cuddling and fun.





Under The Stars

Do you live in a place where you can see the stars at night? Then find a place where you can safely and privately relax, pack a blanket and cooler box with champagne and spend some romantic time under the stars together.





Flowers and Candles

This is also very cliche but your girl will still love it. Beautiful flowers or the bed covered in rose petals. Lots of candles around the bedroom. Let her come home and lead her into the bedroom like that and it’ll be a perfect Valentine’s day for her.





Take Her Dancing

If you know how to dance then this is an especially nice thing to do for V-day. Whatever your style of music (salsa, jazz, ballroom), if you can find a nice restaurant or club where youc an dance slowly and romantically she’ll love it!





Give Her a Massage

Not just a short 5 minute massage but a to-die-for massage. Learn the proper technique, get massage oils and lotions and pamper her for at least an hour or even two.





Scavenger Hunt

Plan an adventure with clues and little rewards leading up to a big treasure. This can be done in your house but also outside in the city or forest. If you’re feeling creative this could be a lot of fun.





Rent a Hotel Room

Even if the hotel is right next door to where you live, the whole luxury thing makes the day and night seem like a perfect romantic getaway. I know it’s expensive and you should only do this if you can afford it and because you really want to do it. Don’t do this just because it’s Valentine’s day.
Make Her a Mixed Tape

Well, in today’s time it’ll be a mixed CD. Get all her favorite songs and some of the most romantic songs of all time and compile it on a CD that you’ll give to her and play on the day at your place.
Look deep into his/her eyes with love and say ‘I Love You’

You may never have said it before or may you be so used to saying ‘I love you’ that it has lost meaning. If you really love your partner then say ‘I love you’ this time like it counts.
Take her out for a long drive at night.

Whether it be on a scenic drive out into the country or right through the heart of the city, a long drive with just the two of you can be incredibly intimate.
Plan a dinner out with your loved one.

It can be at a fancy restaurant, a posh place with a view or even some hippie joint with great food. If you want to make it really special, go to the place where you had your first dinner date together.
Surprise her.

Give her the dress or shoes she left at the store because there was no money or it just seemed like too much at the time.
Give her a plant.

Pot a plant in her garden which will grow up and remind her of you everyday, she crosses the garden.
Send her romantic love quotes.

You can give her a book, you can write a page, you can record a video. Give her a selection of romantic love poems that you think apply to her and your relationship together.
Give her a CD with pictures.

Make a selection of all the best pictures you’ve taken in your time together. This will be an amazing memory and very thoughtful from your side. Ladies, if you want to surprise your man, make him a CD with lots of naughty pictures of yourself.
Arrange a pool party for her at night.

Find a private pool you can use or rent at night. Make sure there are lights under water, and place candles all around the pool.


Go Clubbing

There’s nothing wrong with some wild partying and clubbing on Valentines day. Just the two of you, go out and have fun. You can even pretend like it’s the first time you’re meeting each other and flirt and roleplay.
Sexy Times

If you want to appear wild, give her red, hot lingerie. She can put it on for you right away.
Fake Stay-Away

Surprise her by saying that you won’t be in the city but convince her to stay in that night. Show up at her door with dinner and a movie.
Breakfast in Bed

Serve a breakfast in her bed in the morning of Valentine’s Day. Add her favorite dishes to it.
Perfume

It might be cliche, but personally I can never get enough of my favorite perfume/cologne.Gift a perfume which she loves.
Baths & Spas

Women love to have romantic baths and spas. Make her both, especially with scented soaps, floating candles and message oils.





A Simple Card

Make a valentine’s Day card, full of the feelings you have for your valentine.
Home-Made Movie

If you’re any good with video editing you can make a very special and meaningful gift by combining and editing footage of her and of the two of you. This is really where you can get creative.





Take Her Shopping

All girls love shopping. Tell her you want to spoil her and let her choose whatever she wants. This may be very expensive so be sure that you can afford it (or tell her how much she can spend)
Photographs Are Forever

Print the best pic of both of you and give her a pretty photo frame with your photograph.





Write Her A Poem

Write a poem for her though you do not know how to write. She will love it.
Stick With The Theme

Arrange every moment of the day in the theme of love and hearts.
Burn Baby, Burn

Light a small bonfire at night and feel the warmth of each other around it.
Share a Laugh

Write some love words on craziest things like toilet paper, napkins which can be scented too. Make her laugh.
Jewelery

Buy her some romantic jewelery like a necklace or bracelet etc. You can engrave her name or a romantic message into the jewelery if you like.





Outsource A Musician

Take a group of musicians to her house who can sing romantic chorus for both of you.
Basket of Goodies

You can make a basket fill of little goodies and things your partner needs daily (like body sprays, lotions etc.).
Lipstick Love

On her mirror, write in lipstick, ‘I love you’. Be sure not to use her most expensive lipstick, she might not appreciate that.
Give Her A Day Off

Do her household job or chores for the day so that she can have the day off to do what she wants.
Get a Tattoo

Get a tattoo that’s symbolic of your love for her. I’d be careful getting her name tattooed, but if you’re absolutely 100% certain that she is the one for you, then go for it.
Be Adventurous

Go camping or for an adventure trip on this Valentine’s Day. How about bungee jumping or sky-diving?
Give her a manicure and a foot massage

If you know what you’re doing, make her feet pretty and give her the most relaxing foot-massage in the world.
Boardgame Love

Play scrabble, chess, act like teens, using ‘love’ words as many as you can.





Lead The Way

Leave a trail of rose petals from door of her room to the nearby part where you have arranged champagne and lit candles with romantic music.
Make a Donation

Donate to a charity or noble cause in her name. If she’s the kind of girl that will appreciate that then this can be a very meaningful Valentine’s Day gift.
Engrave Your Love

Carve your names in a heart on a tree. This way a symbol of your love for each other will be around for longer than your time on earth.
Romantic Cleaning

Secretly was her car and decorate it with hearts and flowers. Leave her a romantic note under the windscreen wiper.
Puzzle Love-Letter

Write her a love letter and cut the letter into jigsaw puzzle pieces that she needs to put together before she can read it.
A Formal Invitation

Make her an invitation letter, very attractive, decorated and romantic, inviting her to celebrate Valentine’s Day with you.
Romantic Reading

Hide some heart shaped bookmarks in her books and magazines.
Be An Artist

Draw a silly (or pretty) picture of both of you and write ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ on it.
Publicize Your Love

Publish your love story in the personnel column of the local newspaper.Celebrate your Valentine on social networking sites like Facebook. Make profile of your partner special. Post some lovely message.
Visit a Church

Visit church for praying and remaining together, or even just for being thankful for life. If you’re someone who never goes to church then this may be really special.
Arrange Tickets For Her Favorite Rock Star Concert.

If you’re lucky enough to have a cool concert playing close to or even on Valentine’s day, take her there and enjoy the music together.
Give Her A Gift That Will Remind Her Every Month

Gift a monthly subscription of favorite website of magazines that he/she usually read.
Give Her Your Favorite Cologne

Give her your cologne, even if it’s half-used. This way when she misses you she can still smell your favorite scent and be reminded of you.
It’s In The Stars

Give her a love horoscope that describes your wonderful future with together with her.





Be Anonymous

Send her gifts without a sender’s name on it. Flowers, chocolates. You can even have them delivered to her work address during the day.

Is long distance love possible?

Can a love overcome mountains, oceans and thousand of agonizing miles? If we were to ever find our true love, our solemate, on a different continent, can it be our destiny to be together? How can the longing of two lovers hearts surpass the many, many obstacles presented by such a situation? Is true love stronger than anything put before it?

Two cultures, the highest mountains, the deepest seas and the longest miles may separate two hearts, but only time can tell if the hearts are to be together forever...

Miles and miles and miles apart.
Although so far you've touched my heart.
Your laugh, your voice, your adoring smile,
Seem to shorten every mile.

I wake every morning and rest at night,
My thoughts and dreams filled with your sight.
Oh how I wish, even for one night,
I could hold your hand and you hold mine tight.

Not just a little briused or battered,
When I think of the distance it's completely shattered.
We'll never give up or say goodbye.
Remember together, the moon in the sky.
Your heart's a part of me and mine of you.
With that alone, we shall not be blue.Is long distance love possible?

Can a love overcome mountains, oceans and thousand of agonizing miles? If we were to ever find our true love, our solemate, on a different continent, can it be our destiny to be together? How can the longing of two lovers hearts surpass the many, many obstacles presented by such a situation? Is true love stronger than anything put before it?

Two cultures, the highest mountains, the deepest seas and the longest miles may separate two hearts, but only time can tell if the hearts are to be together forever...

Miles and miles and miles apart.
Although so far you've touched my heart.
Your laugh, your voice, your adoring smile,
Seem to shorten every mile.

I wake every morning and rest at night,
My thoughts and dreams filled with your sight.
Oh how I wish, even for one night,
I could hold your hand and you hold mine tight.

Not just a little briused or battered,
When I think of the distance it's completely shattered.
We'll never give up or say goodbye.
Remember together, the moon in the sky.
Your heart's a part of me and mine of you.
With that alone, we shall not be blue.

Lets be sincere here, Asian girls are pretty and sexy creatures. I won’t be surprised if you have once held a secret desire to date Asian girls before of if you even still have such a desire. If you are not an Asian you probably know little about Asia and would find the girls even more alluring since their ways seem quite distinct from European girls or girls from other part of the world. This is not to say that they are a different specie altogether but their rich cultural heritage makes them quite distinct in their way of life or behavior. Globalization has brought about a more blending of cultures between different lands but still you just might need some tips on how to date an Asian girl successfully.

Are you among the many who have tried, really tried to date an Asian but can’t seem to get past the first date? Here are some tips that would help you, as you would see the problem has not been her but you and your style.

First tip is that you should not try to date an Asian girl. I mean don’t try the traditional dating moves. A dinner, movie, an occasional goodnight kiss and the no more calls from her. This is what everyone else is doing and it comes with too much pressure, expectations and awkwardness. These is what every one else has been doing with her. Try something easier, cheaper and less conventional. Something like just meeting for coffee, no big set up or preparations. She is less prepared and expectant. The atmosphere is less charged, more relaxed and thus more fun without the usual dating expectations.

Every guy tries that gets a woman or an Asian out on a date tries to impress her with is detailed “rap” or speech moves. The truth is she has heard it all before in many variations and versions. In this case less is more. The less you try to impress her the more the Asian girl is impressed. Try listening to her and getting her talk about herself. All you need is a small degree of interest. This throws her off guard as you are different and challenging, and Asian girls like you challenging.

Do not be Mr. Goody-goody. Be a bit naughty throw in unexpected and mischievous remarks to leave her wondering if you just said that. Do not over do it but do not show her you are over impressed with her looks. Naughty statements and actions leave them wondering more about the kind of guy you are.

Asian girls get a lot of admirers and so you have to be different to leave an impression. Most of them would want to give you little test to see how firm you are. Do not just give in to every one of her whim. Sometimes you can playfully yet firmly resist or refuse her. This is quite a turn on for Asian girls, a guy who takes charge (please don’t over do it)

Believe it or not an Asian girl would rate you more if she discovers you are admired by other Asian girls. So don’t spend all your time with one. Widen out and let them know you are trying to decide and have a lot of admirers. You just would be surprised with he results.

Asians are family bound, if you meet an Asian lady you would likely notice that family bounds are more respected within them. So get to know more about her family. Be interested in her family it sure would boost the possibility of your success.

Honesty is also a quality that is highly respected in the Asian society. A man of honor does not lie and does not abandon his responsibility. If you wish to impress an Asian girl you have to prove to her that you can be such a man of honor.

I believe you are better armed to tackle the next Asian girl that comes along. These tips if properly followed would leave you smiling each time.

All you need is love. Unfortunately, love is not everything to some people. They need more. The world we live in may be a reason to become paranoid of strangers, and suspicious of our own family, at times. However, when you are in a relationship, those feelings should subside. For some, the fears go away without a second thought. For others, it is hard to trust. That is the main reason a boyfriend can become a controlling nightmare.

It is hard to pinpoint the answer to why this behavior exists, but, if you feel as if you are being controlled, being able to identify the behavior is your first step to freedom.


10. Always By Your Side

If you are in a relationship where it seems that you have no time to yourself, chances are you have a controlling boyfriend. He never wants you to go anywhere without him. There is no more “girls night out” for you and your friends, unless he is with you. Doesn’t sound like a good time.
9. Do What He Likes

When you do go out, it is to an event that HE chooses. You may not feel like going to a movie, but it is what he wants to do, for example. Also, his turning down an offer to do what you would like is a key sign that he is not flexible. It often leaves the impression that he does not care about your interests. He may, or may not, but he is not supportive either way.
8. Do Things For Him

“Honey, go pick up some soda for me.” sounds like a genuine request for assistance. If your boyfriend is constantly asking you to run errands, without including you as the benefactor, this is another sign of the need to feel in control. Instead of “…pick up some soda for me.”, the request should be, “We’re out of soda. Can you go pick some up, please?”. Can you see the difference? WE are in need of soda, simply.
7. No Manners

In the previous example, the “please” was left out intentionally. Your boyfriend will not be polite. He will not say “thank you”, “you’re welcome”, “please” or even “excuse me” to you. It is because he is expecting you to comply with his requests. He also feels as if you should be thanking him for allowing you to do things for him.
6. Questions, Questions

When you can finally break through the chains, and find some free time for yourself, be prepared: your controlling boyfriend will interrogate you when you return. Putting himself in a “father figure” position will install more of a sense of control. Treating you like a child that went to the mall, prior to doing her homework, is the kind of humiliation in you he is trying to achieve.
5. No Questions, No Answers

Unlike the aforementioned subject, your boyfriend will come and go as he pleases, without answering to anyone – especially to you. If you try to question his whereabouts or activities, he will become defensive. The subject will immediately transfer from your asking, “where were you?” to his comeback remark about how you nag him too much, or something similar to that effect. He will ignore answering the question, and make you feel guilty for asking it. This is in hope that you will not do it again.
4. He’s Always Right

In an argument with a controlling personality, it is very difficult for him to accept defeat. The controlling boyfriend will get more defensive, change the subject, or bring up a past occurrence, when he was, indeed, correct, in order to prove his point with the issue at hand. He may not always be right, completely, but he is never wrong.
3. Can’t Buy Me Love

credit cardsFools gold has been around for centuries. However, a fool AND his gold have special meaning to the controlling boyfriend. He will buy you nice jewelry, take you to expensive restaurants and maybe even offer to pay a debt of yours. He will say it is because he loves you. Not true. He needs to feel superior to you. You now owe him, in his mind. Who is the fool? To him, you are.
2. You’re Worthless

Belittling your self-confidence can be have very serious consequences. Making you feel as if you are worthless without him, the controlling boyfriend will prey on times that you may be stressed the most. If you have just lost a job, or if you are experiencing normal hormonal reactions, this is the time he will strike. He wants you to feel as if life is not worth living without him. It’s hard to believe, but his confidence level is actually lower than yours.
1. No Means No

This is the most upsetting trait that a controlling boyfriend can display. If he forces you to do things, against your will, he is not in love with you. Whether it is going to a baseball game, when you hate outdoor stadiums, or, even more harsh an act, makes you perform sexually against your will, he is NOT in love with you. Not showing you the courtesy to respect your wishes is not a behavior that goes away. This will continue as an abusive relationship, where you will be treated as an object, instead of a person.couple arguing

In conclusion, we all need to feel love in our lives. We all can find love in so many people that are in our lives already. Make sure you listen to the advice of your family and friends. They know you best, and care about you more than the rude, violent, controlling boyfriend that buys you the same cheap flowers after an altercation. You should always remember to respect yourself, and not be fooled into believing that you are any less of a person than anyone else. Put yourself on a pedestal, and never let any boyfriend make you feel as if you don’t belong there.

Cougars (women in their 40s+ dating men 7+ years their junior) or Pumas (women in their 30’s dating younger men) whatever you like to call them, whether you love or hate them, they are out there. From Halle Berry to Demi Moore they love their younglings, and we’re not talking about their children. Why these women do it? Because they can, they are at their sexual peak and who better than a younger guy to fulfill those needs? They’ve got stamina and that’s all they need. Do you like older women?


What is a cougar?The Unknown Cougar !

The short answer: A cougar is an older woman who is primarily attracted to and has sex with significantly younger men. I have to ask …”and this is wrong and unacceptable, why?” (giggle)

The long answer: The most commonly accepted definition of a cougar is a woman 40 years of age or older who exclusively pursues very young men. “Define very” (insert giggle and cougarish grin here) The onset of the cougar years is hotly debated. The ten year age difference seems to be an unspoken but accepted minimum between participants.


Why does this happen?

Is it about sex? A woman sexually peaks at 40 while a man peaks at the age of 17. I think if a woman passes the “age of matrimony”, before she finds an old partner that shares the same passion, she would venture into recreational flavoring of younger men.

Why would men ever be interested in older women? It’s simply because they are attracted to the confidence and sexual experience of older women and there are no strings called commitment attached.

Older, single women have been dubbed "cougars" for a reason: they're felines (females) who hunt younger men. As such, cougars are an interesting and unusual breed of women. They seem to want what men want: sex with no strings attached.

In that respect, they seem almost like the female counterpart of The Player: The Playerette. However, the cougar and the playerette have some key differences.

Read on to learn these differences and get some tips to help you make the most of these great creatures.

Typically, cougars prey upon men almost young enough to be their sons. Fortysomething cougars would be attracted to men in their 20’s, and fiftysomething cougars would pursue men in their 30’s and so on. Some cougars are less interested in a relationship than a sexual conquest, perhaps enjoying the fact that they are physically appealing to men who are considered to be in the prime of their virility. Again I ask …”and this is wrong and unacceptable, why?” and I’m giggling…What I didn’t know was that a cougar can be married or unmarried.Ashton Kutscher & Demi Moore

Although the term ‘cougar’ comes from the big game predatory cat of the same name, the cougar connection also may allude to the wearing of animal print clothing by older and more sexually aggressive women. How many of you just stopped to think if they have been sighted wearing animal print lately? I know I just mentally scanned my closet, phew I’m good.

In my opinion we are hearing more about older women with younger men because people in general have become more accepting and desensitized with just about everything in life. Women are financially independent and are looking for fun with no complications or expectations. Not to say that dating a younger man doesn’t come with complications.


Types of cougars

First off, we must understand that there are certain types of cougars.

Cougar Type 1- The type of cougar that hooks up with young athletic-types (think Susan Sarandon in Bull Durham). She may settle for a less physical, more suave catch, but the point is, she thinks like a man in that she's looking for the hottest-looking guy she can get -- the female equivalent of a guy meeting the Swedish bikini team.

Cougar Type 2- The confused cougar that looks for easy sex, but really seeks a relationship man. She'll tart herself up and come on strong, but right around the time things start to get intimate -- either shortly before or after you know her in the biblical sense -- she reveals herself to be a seeker.

Tread carefully and don't get caught with type No. 2.

how to spot a cougar
Appearance:

* She dresses quite suggestively, often younger than her age -- she wants desperately not to look middle-aged.
* Her clothes will generally be tight or low-cut -- anything to make a guy notice her. From afar she might look like a young hottie, which gets guys to approach. Get close, see the wrinkles and makeup, and her true age becomes apparent -- but by that time she's already being flirtatious and has lured you into her lair.
* She'll often be a smoker (cigarettes are a sexy prop, and "got a light?" is a good approach) who dies her hair (blonde is most popular) and dolls herself up (seems to be sponsored by Revlon).
* They often hang out in groups, acting as wingwomen for each other. On the other hand, given their considerable experience and resulting confidence, they will not wait for their friends to hit the bars. Logistically, it's easier for an easily picked-up woman to fly solo.

Her behavior is much more forward...

It’s a common question and everybody seems to have an opinion; can guys and girls really be just friends? Depending on whom you ask you get a variety of answers. So while in theory there is no good reason that guys and girls can’t be friends in reality it really depends on the people involved. Some people can pull off opposite sex friendships and some people can’t. We asked around and got some pretty interesting, and often contradictory answers to the question, “Can guys and girls be just friends?”

I think they can if they want to, I mean what’s the big deal? It’s not like you want to date everybody you meet. Some guys are just too goofy to want to have as more than a friend.
- Laura, 16

Any girl who has a guy as a good friend is either a tease or living in denial. Guys may not always make a move on their girl “friends” but they wouldn’t ever turn the girl down if she made a move on them.
- Steven, 18

It’s just wrong. Guys and girls can’t relate to each other, they live such different lives. Guys are all about sports and tricks and keeping it real with their boys. Girls are gossips and backstabbers. I can see why a girl may want to be friends with guys because girls are vicious to each other but guys don’t need girls as their friends. If a girl is in your life she’s either a relative or your girlfriend, there’s no need for them anywhere else.
- Kai, 17

Guys are dogs. They just want one thing from a girl and it’s not good companionship. I have enough trouble fighting off guys who want to date me, who needs to deal with guys pretending to be your friend just to get to you?
- Alixandra, 15

Everybody makes this such an issue but it’s not. Some guys can be your friend and some can’t, it’s that simple. People are individuals and it’s not fair to group all guys together or all girls together as being one way. Friends come in all shapes, sizes, ages, colors AND genders.
- Kirsten, 17

Only really weak guys can’t be friends with girls. Girls are cool and make awesome friends.
- Tom, 15

Honestly, I’m torn on this. I’d like to say that yes guys and girls can be just friends but every boyfriend I’ve ever had started out as just a friend and then became something more. I’m not sure anymore that acting like “just a friend” isn’t just another move that guys use to get a girl.
- Lisle, 19

The “just friends” move is gold! Works every time. Of course guys and girls CAN be just friends but why would any guy want that? If I’m spending time with a girl it’s because I like her as more than a friend. I will say this though, there are some girls I wanted to get with at first but then decided they’d be cool as a friend instead but those friendships never last long.
- Aaron, 16